Dr. Earl R. Smith II

admin says:

71 Responses to “How do you deal with someone who is indecisive?”
1.
July 28th, 2007 at 10:08 am e
Gary Lewis: There is a difference between someone who can’t / won’t make a decision and someone who won’t stick with a decision.
The first, is this a normal pattern or are they going through some trying time in their life? If normal – get out quick, their lack of leadership might just take you down with them anyway. If out of the ordinary, discuss it with them directly and privately and offer to assist to move the project forward.
If the person is just a wimp and won’t stick by their own decisions, they will actually take you down (back stab, blame, finger point…) before they go down – so get out yet today!
2.
July 28th, 2007 at 10:10 am e
Dennis Furr: The answer will be different depending on whether the person is your superior, peer or employee.
For superiors I agree with Ron Moore. Break the problem into manageable components. Additionally, provide examples (case studies, best practices, white papers) that support a decision.
For employees I would be concerned whether they had the correct skill sets to make a decision or if their indecisiveness is a confidence issue. If it is confidence that is the problem, be supportive but emphasise the importance of timely responses as a function of a successful outcome. If the problem is training then I would either provide supplimental training or reassign the task to a qualified staff member. Try to explain to the employee why such steps are required.
For a peer I would discuss the effects of a poor decision weighed against the effects of no decision. Sometimes, and in my experience often, no decision is worse than a poor decision. That isn’t to say that an incorrect decision is better than no decision but often there are more than one correct answers but one or more correct answers is best suited.
3.
July 28th, 2007 at 10:11 am e
Sanjay Negi: As in a game of chess, most situations in life give only one obvious right move to make. It is only when we have more than one plausible option that the issue of embracing a choice faces us.
People who are more analytical and logical in disposition, try to mentally home in on the “Right Choice” and get stuck in the process. This appears as indecisiveness to others.
People who are more right brained either do not analyze too much or have an intuitive feel for the right choice and therefore normally are quicker in reaching conclusions. They are also adept at lateral thinking…If I can’t decide let me ask someone who can….
One thing that can be said about slow decision makers is that they feel the onus of the consequences of their decisions more and therefore hesitate to commit in a hurry. Quick decision makers on the other hand rely on the resilience of the support environment to carry them through. This makes them appear confident too.
It is difficult to say which approach is better….I would remain happily indecisive on this one.
As far as your question is concerned, if you accept the sincerity of intentions behind indecisiveness, it should not be very difficult to deal with such talent.
4.
July 28th, 2007 at 10:12 am e
Richard Clark: I am not sure! Sorry couldn’t resist.
In all seriousness, in terms of somebody that is indecisive you just ave to tray and coach them into making a decision. In my experience indecisive people normally know what they want to do, they may just lack the confidence or conviction to go with their senses.
If they are a superior, I always try to offer some rationale or background info to help aid their decision.
If somebody can’t stick to a decision, that is completely different. That has to be the most frustrating thing. Especially when that person is convinced they told you about their change in view, even when they haven’t.
With that I find that I have to point out the change, ask them to clairfy which standpoint is correct and to put it into writing. It can sometimes change again, but it normally provides clarity to all in the decision makign process.
5.
July 28th, 2007 at 10:14 am e
Noor Muhammad: Idecisivenes either may be due to not having enough knowledge about that specific matter and person is shy to ask. In this case you need to help him/her out giving enough information OR due to built-in habit, to deal with the habitual person is little difficult if he is leader, which I experienced. What I was doing grouping the matters in critical and non-critical and taking non-critical decisions on my own keeping him informed; and having strong follow-up for critical decisions to be taken by him. In worst case escalte to the next level.This worked for me but no garantee in other situations.
6.
July 28th, 2007 at 10:14 am e
Monteverde Maria: Most of the responses talk about insecurity as a reason. I have run into numerous people where the reason for this behavior is that they are perfectionist’s. The don’t make decisions because they don’t want to be wrong. You need to determine which is the case. This will determine how you deal with the situation. How I have dealt with it in the past is to let the individual know that decisions most of time can be changed and are needed to move a project forward. The decision you made today may need to be made again tomorrow with further information that was not available earlier.
7.
July 28th, 2007 at 10:16 am e
Bill Naddef:
Superior: I would make the decisions and suffer the consequences.
Partner: I have been confronted with a partner that would tell me what I wanted to hear and always show up in important meetings and do exactly the opposite of what he agreed to do. These people are a menace to business and if you are in a minorty position, ie. less than 50% of the board etc. it proves to be a major pain.
Subordinate: Get rid of them. They will never change. As we learn in business, it is better to make a wrong decision than to make no decision at all. It is always better to make mistakes and learn from them than to doom yourself to failure from indecision.
These are my opinions and are not supported by anything other than experience.
8.
July 28th, 2007 at 10:17 am e
James Stuart: On one hand I could say … well … perhaps, but to be honest, it simply depends on circumstances, how you feel about the situation, excuses for indecision – lots of reasons really.
You see – some people really do mistake indecisiveness as not making decisions. That’s so untrue. It’s only that the person has other things to think about – more important things like what’s the weather doing and what will they be up to at the weekend and is the declining oil supply going to push up fuel prices.
9.
July 28th, 2007 at 10:18 am e
Mamta Narang: In IT industry everything moves around applying the logical points. But still many a times we get stuck. Gathering more data helps us in taking the decision. But when people around me behave or show an indecision in there thinking approach, I look at the root cause. There are two important books which are really helpful in this regard – ‘Games people play’ and ‘What do you say after you say hello’
10.
July 28th, 2007 at 10:19 am e
David Martin: Everything that has been wrote here is true and really interesting and could, has said, be part of a book.
If patience is the mother of Business ( or relationship ), business must go on and decision has to be taken.
All situations multiplied by all types of persons are different. But not you ?! So could you translate your question to : Why do I give to this person the possibility to take a decision ( even if they are from the top management ) ?
In this case, you should present only one solution that foot the best what you are expecting and involve this person to think that he was part of the decision you wanted him to took. In such case, you will see that people are sometime more involved by taken your own decision, with accrued participation and proposal get a better results and solution.
Getting decision can be a real strategy and this is more true and different in is sales process. And as also said, the person who has to take the decision is sometimes not the right person and you would have to take also the difficult decision to replace or remove this person from your team . .
11.
July 28th, 2007 at 10:20 am e
Mike Clarke: In most cases, people who find decisions difficult are Amiable (Merrill Reid model). There is some really good material on how to deal with Amiables. For example, pushing an Amiable into a decision will often mean that they rescind the decision later.
Here are some overall points:
Be relaxed and moderately paced
Be genuine
Communicate patiently
Invite their opinions, listen reflectively
Facilitate decisions – do not push
Mutually agree on goals
Negotiate action plans with completion dates
Offer personal assurances around risk
Maintain ongoing contact
12.
July 28th, 2007 at 10:21 am e
John Schmitt: Very thoughtful, excellent comments. By the number of responses does that mean there are that many indecisive people out there? Thought I was the only one with inlaws that take 10 minutes to order at a restuarant.
I’ve always thought big decisions could be held off until they had to be made allowing time to collect more data, etc. Then I started to read Malcohm Gladwell’s “Blink”. Wow, what a different perspective.
Not sure that a book can change a long engrained life patterns but you might give it a try. It certainly can help raise the topic.
13.
July 28th, 2007 at 10:22 am e
Susan Otterson: Examine the corporate culture, because you might find that it is the reason for much indecision. If you work in a culture where there is lots of finger pointing and CYA activity, then people are less likely to stick their neck out. If you can foster an environment where people are comfortable making decisions then perhaps more decisiveness will result.
14.
July 28th, 2007 at 10:23 am e
Steven Bloom: There is lots of good information in the replies already. However, here is another approach that no-one has specifically discussed. Most problems in the workplace can be dealt with in the form of coaching. I find that this is the most often underutilised tool/technique in the workplace. People (managers) are not taught how to deal with people very well. They are not taught systems or process for dealing with people and their work issues. If find that this gap in managers knowledge is a HUGE issue in most workplaces. Managers are too focussed on the P&L or Revenue to put any energy into HR matters and the human beings that work for them.
There is a great coaching methodology called GROW which helps people make decsions using someone as the coach or facilitator. You can also teach someone to use GROW themselve to self coach.
GROW is of course an acronym. Goal, Reality, Options, Will. You take the person through each step by asking questions. Each word in GROW represents the stages of questioning that you need to follow sequentially. Here are some example questions for each stage.
Goal – what is the aim? what are you trying to achieve? What does success look like? What are the milestones? How will you measure it?
Reality – What is happening now (what, when where, how much, how often)? Who is involved, When things are not going well on this issue, what happens to you? What is the effect on others? What have you done about this so far? What is holding you back from finding a way forward?
Options – What are your options? What else could you do? What if…? ( time, power, money, etc) Would you like another suggestion?
Will – Which options do you choose? To what extent do this meet all your objectives? When precisley are you going to start and finish each action step? What could arise to hinder you in taking these steps? What personal resistance do you have, if any, to taking these steps? What committment on a 1-10 scale do you have on taking these actions? What prevents this from being a 10? Is there anything else you want to talk about?
After having this converstation you should notice that the person you are coaching is doing most of the talking. You need to listen carefully, and help guide them to their own decisions. Careful not to make them feel stupid when they find out they new the answers all along. You just have to help them see it. I have used this method quite alot and find it invaluable.
As I said, the purpose of Performance Coaching is to raise the performer’s awareness – self generated high quality relevant input and responsibility – the performer’s choice to own a task by the coach’s use of effective questioning.
I learned this from Red Pill Performance Consultants in Australia. Another consultant that is good at this sort of thing, and strategic planning, balanced scorecard is Eventity in Australia
15.
July 28th, 2007 at 10:24 am e
Dean Simmer: I find it beneficial to funnel their concerns and objections down slowly, one by one. If someone is indecisive, it is not generally tied to a lack of care about the subject hand but often times a cause of their penchant to over analyze the situation. If you can provide them with two-option choices several times over, I have found that is a great way to step into their opinion.
For example, when being indecisive about dinner:
Do you want to eat at home or eat out?
Would you prefer Pizza or Fast Food?
Pizza: Would you prefer Deep Dish or thin crust?
Fair enough. They make a decision. As far as sticking with the decision, that is the hardest part. But you have to point out that you cannot be non-committal to many decisions; force them to have to commit to the decision they make. Encourage them, perhaps, but make sure to hold them to it.
16.
July 28th, 2007 at 10:25 am e
Tomas Hoffmann: If you are working with people who are indecisive, you have to be really careful about the tasks you are going to give to that person. The outcome could affect to the whole team, and break their team spirit. Consequently, what you should do, before giving an indecisive person such a risky task, is train them. What does this mean? Well… show them that you trust them, that you consider them capable to take such a decision. Try to help them give the first steps. Maybe you could assist them in the first decision they make, showing them you consider them smart enough to do the right decision. Let them see the procedural you follow to take such decision. Try to built a path of action, so they can follow it.
At the same time you could turn this one person decision into a team decision. The indecisive individual can hear others opinion about the decision he is going to make. By working as a team he may see things that otherwise would have got over his view.
17.
July 28th, 2007 at 10:26 am e
Carmel Jackoby: There is actually a name for someone who changes their opinion, and decision on almost a daily basis- Pyromaniac. No joke. Each morning they set on a new fire. I met several managers who behave like that; Each morning they would come out with that crazy look on their face and “The Greatest Idea Ever”, which was a total 180 to “the greatest idea ever” from yesterday – now, so out of date.
In a startup environment that might be a great asset to have in order to get an idea off the ground and running, but at it that behavior does not stop stop, or it will stop everything else.
18.
July 28th, 2007 at 10:27 am e
Maheshwari Kapoor: Here are my answers.
How do you deal with a person who is indecisive?
In my opinion such people are either not confident of themselves or they fear taking risks (if I might use the phrase loosely).
There could be two solutions:
1. You hand hold and help them decide
2. You decide for them
If the person is your senior #2 might be difficult; so go prepared with a list of reasons why your decision is the best and influence him.
How do you respond when you encounter someone who doesn’t seem to be able to make a decision and stick with it? How do you overcome the damage they can cause to a team that is relying on them to decide?
Such a person surely misses clarity of thought. Give him / her feedback and let them know they are causing damage.
If he is the only trouble maker in the team and the others are mature enough, the team can collectively help him improve. That’s the best part of working in teams. If you think it is impossible to influence his behavior find a replacement (if subordinate) or escalate to his superior (if senior).
Speaking with the person should help in my opinion.
19.
July 28th, 2007 at 10:29 am e
Kedar Sathe: I think the question to ask ourselves when we come across such people is why are they indecisive? In business contexts I feel that indecisiveness stems from a fear of consequences if an incorrect decision is made or an inferiority complex that makes a person feel that they do not have the authority or ability to make a decision. In personal contexts I feel indecisiveness stems from a person’s inability to know what gives him/her the most enjoyment and whether that person would be considered popular in a group. For example, if a person cannot decide which clothes to buy it probably is because that person cannot foresee if they will like how they look in one set of clothes or another. Or if a person, in a group, is asked which movie they would like to see or which restaurant they would like to eat in most people will respond with a I don’t know or anything is okay. I feel people say this because they do not want to speak their mind and be overridden by the others or worse yet be considered as someone with a poor choice.
20.
July 28th, 2007 at 10:30 am e
Darrin King: What you will find is that people are indecisive because they fear the outcome. My best advice to you is make the person feel confident to make that decision. There are too many variables to specifically answer your question but if you take away the persons fear then they will usually make the decision.
21.
July 28th, 2007 at 10:31 am e
Bart Leahy: In my line of work, I often don’t have time for indecisiveness. On the plus side, the people I work for don’t have much time for it, either. However, the best way I’ve found to deal with these folks is to make an issue time-critical (which is usually the case). I ask, politely (especially if said person outranks me in the adminisphere) “Could I have an answer by X?” If the answer is no, I ask why not. I ask if the issue is something I can control or fix; and if so, I do that. If it’s a larger issue–i.e., above my pay grade–I move it on up the chain. I just shoot the problem between the eyes.
I haven’t had to worry about confronting someone who is indecisive if their work affects a team I’m on because usually the boss does that for me. And that confrontation often results in said person moving elsewhere. It’s not pretty, but in a short-fuse environment, indecisiveness = business or professional death.
22.
July 28th, 2007 at 10:32 am e
Dr. Franz Thiebaut: Take the decision for them!
23.
July 28th, 2007 at 10:34 am e
Jeanne Kramer-Smyth: My favorite solution for this sort of situation is to introduce the PROs and CONs approach. I have often found that once people see the pluses and minuses of each option written down in black and white, it gets easier to make a choice – and back up that choice when others question it later.
I have also found that indecision often is a result of a person knowing which choice they WANT to make – and feeling that they cannot make that choice for some reason. Either they think they cannot defend that choice – or in their heart of hearts they see the wisdom of why another choice makes more sense.
24.
July 28th, 2007 at 10:35 am e
Fred Newbrough: Indecisiveness is usually and indication that one is not confident in their understanding of a situation or their own capabilities to deal with the results of the decision if they happen to be wrong. This lack of confidence immobilizes them and those around them. Sometimes this indecisiveness is born of fear of failure but the end result of such indecisiveness is minimal or no progress towards a desired solution or goal.
I’ve worked in environments where managers did not know how to acutely weigh risks. This was particularly evident while working in government bureaucracies. This indecisiveness interestingly enough tended to disappear in September when spending the last of their budgeted funds was at stake.
That said, I think the best way to deal with indecisive people depends on how much they really affect you. I tend to be independent. I like to operate under the “it is easier to ask for forgiveness than to ask for permission”. That does not mean I go off half cocked and don’t involve them. I just learned to present situations in black and white and more importantly in email. Ask them directly and suggest the action you believe is the correct one without equivocating. Also it is beneficial to sell your idea to those that have influence on the person in question. This doesn’t have to be a direct sell. I’ve found that indecisive people tend to be waiting for someone else to make the decision for them which results in their tendency to shift their positions frequently because their decision can change as much and as often as the dominant personalities around them change. That is why it is important to sell to others who have contact with the person and reach an informal consensus.
You can of course choose the direct approach and confront the person in question and tell them they are being indecisive but in reality that is just likely to produce a very decisive reaction from them one directed at you personally. Indecisive people tend to consider themselves nice people and it is exactly their accommodating nature that is their downfall and also which leads to most people starting with “he’s a nice guy…but”.
I can personally deal with indecisive people because I will make the decisions I need to with or without them. Decisiveness is the feature of a mature personality who knows how to take responsibility for their decisions and the ability of one to stick to a decision after making it is indicative of the amount of thought and passion that went into the decision in the first place. Those who are indecisive (providing they have enough information to make an informed decision) tend to suffer the most from the fact that they are disengaged and often don’t really care about the decisions they are making all the while they are secretly hoping to coast along without making any waves or catching any for that matter.
That is why indecisiveness is a plague to progress and efficiency. It and its progenitor fear combined with its sibling, impotence, can wreak havoc on an organization or team. The only thing worse that I can imagine is having two bosses one telling you one thing and then another telling you something leaving you to reconcile which direction to go.
25.
July 28th, 2007 at 10:36 am e
Robert Fornal: Directly … if they will not make decisions, nothing will help directly … however, I have had success integrating / pushing small changes in rapid frequency … over time this does tend to work.
26.
July 28th, 2007 at 10:37 am e
Cheryl Jurich Rogers: I usually don’t respond to these types of inquiries, as I’m not the expert. Although I’ve found that ambivalence and sometimes… indecisiveness… is part of the full functioning business lifecycle and these folks are usually valuable to a team in some sort of way, shape or form. I’m going to make the assumption that you are a very quick, aggressive and decisive person – therefore, this person on the opposite side of the spectrum is indecisive or ambivalent – and probably very frustrating to you and others on your team like you.
My only advice, as a manager ( who often hates indecisiveness) is to embrace the ambivalence and do your best to offer your solid, well thought out analysis, solutions and advice. Be prepared to explain and defend your reasoning in detail. Usually a little bit of gentle nudging and full support of the indecisive one will help do the trick. These folks need to be secure in their decisions, as a manager, report or peer, you can help by giving full support and offering suggestions.
Be patient and embrace this personality trait – it’s not always bad. On the flipside, perhaps you can have a one on one with this person to give him or her some of your feedback on how it may be affecting the team. Odds are, he or she, is not aware of their “effect” on the organization or team — and if he or she is a team players, will likely try to improve or change this trait so that it is improved, better understood or valued by you and your organization.
Just think, if we were all extremely “assertive and quick thinking/risk takers” would we really be able to produce great products, services, etc? Those who “analyse” and are slow to make decisions really do serve great value in an organization…. it’s just hard to recognize sometimes.
27.
July 28th, 2007 at 10:38 am e
Thamir Ghaslan: As always, you shoot around very stimulating questions and I’m glad I have you in my network.
Onwards,
- How do you deal with a person who is indecisive? Superior, employee or colleague.
I can tolerate indecisive subordinates and colleagues but my tolerance drops as you go higher in the chain.
– how do you respond when you encounter someone who doesn’t seem to be able to make a decision and stick with it?
My first reaction is: Why is he afraid, grow some spine! Be confident.
Generally, I would normally find a root cause for this behaviour: missing or wrong information, level of risk, and try to help out.
- How do you overcome the damage they can cause to a team that is relying on them to decide?
Find a more competent replacement!
- And, how do you address the problem directly with them? I found it a real challenge.
Be honest and blunt, business is business and there should’nt be any hard feelings!
28.
July 28th, 2007 at 10:40 am e
Julie Christine: What good things comes to that person by being indecisive? Something makes it worth while for them to be that way. I find it helps with this person to ask them what they want and then in making that decision chuck it to a specific time/date…
What might someone have to believe to have the experience of being indecisive and oblivious to the experience of the rest of the team.
It is a challenge but until you find out what is motivating that persons indecisiveness it is not going to change. Sounds like being indecisive is working well for them. I am curious about what the good thing is that comes to them by being that way and what theyare wanting.
29.
July 28th, 2007 at 10:40 am e
Robert Jaques: I had a manager once who hated this kind of behavior. He spoke about it repeatedly, then things came to a head. At a meeting, it became obvious that a couple of people were not prepared, so he asked those people to leave the meeting and not return until they were ready. In the meantime, he moved all the decisions affecting those people up on the agenda and made decisions without their input. He only had to do that once – funny enough it didn’t happen again.
30.
July 28th, 2007 at 10:41 am e
Monika Palma: There is always that positive reinforcement theory…But more on a personal level, my husband is as undecisive as it gets and once we reach some sort of solid decision, few days later everything gets undecided. If I want to get some sort of consensus, I start with negotiation to agree to decide and then move on to particulars. Sometimes stressing the importance of making a decision and creating a bigger picture helps him, even for a short period to clear the indecision cloud. Sticking to it, that is difficult, I use guilt.
31.
July 28th, 2007 at 10:42 am e
Anthony Mantova: I had a fellow director last year who was like this. I dont know if it was the best approach, but his boss would just put him on the spot to make a decision and stick with it. Now in his case he would end up blaming mistakes on subordinates and claiming all the success when it occurred, so clearly there were other negative issues with him.
I think the best approach would be to move an indecisive person to a position in the company that doesnt require leadership. Otherwise, I’m thinking you give them the boot.
32.
July 28th, 2007 at 10:44 am e
John Tummolo: Great question. However, an answer is relative to the indecisive party/parties and the circumstances. A book could be written on the subject. Are you at liberty to clarify?
a) your relationship (a boss, a peer, a subordinate, a customer?)
b) the decision(s) to be made
c) the stake(s) of prolonging the decision(s)
etc. etc.
For example, if the indecisive party is a “911 co-worker” who is “frozen like a deer in teh headlights” as a victim bleeds profusely I would “take over immediately” and attempt to save the person’s life by applying pressure. However, how you should respond in any other circumstance becomes “less immediate” if a life and/or your personal finances are not in jeopardy. Clarify the circumstances and give everyone a chance to present relative solutions.
33.
July 28th, 2007 at 10:54 am e
Enric Blanco González: According to my own experience, nobody is totally indecisive. Everybody has its own levers. You just have to found them: who or what is that person afraid of or influenced by? What does effectively motivate him to take action?
The problem is that sometimes you just can’t pull those levers by yourself in order to obtain what you need from that person. Sometimes you need to act on another person, maybe even outside the organization, in order to indirectly influence on that indecisive person.
As an example, I once let the client of a project managed by me get a little bit unsatisfied in a calculated way because I knew he would scale up his complain to the top management in my company. By doing so I obtained the resources needed to solve the problem the client was having. It was helpless to ask for these resources by myself because the top management was indecisive, but at the end I obtained what I needed because I knew the top management just wouldn’t allow the client to get angry beyond the point he already was. The final result was that the client got the problem solved and both the client and my top management were satisfied with my project management. They even didn’t notice the subtle “manoeuvre”…
Of course, should you addressed an indecisive person in such a way, you have to be careful. You have to be subtle. You have to be sensitive. You have to be discreet. And you have to conduct yourself in an ethical way; if you don’t then your action will be both objectionable and ineffective. It’s all about finding alternative ways to influence on somebody, rather than menacing him.
34.
July 28th, 2007 at 10:55 am e
Holly Maso: It sounds from your message that you already tried to talk with the person directly. I think that indecisive people have a history of being shot down for making bad decisions, and/or may question their own skills and aptitude. I think that how you handle it would depend on the relationship you have with the person, and their role. I agree that it comes from insecurity and the fear of making a mistake, in which case they need an environment where they know that they will receive positive feedback and encouragement for sticking with the original plan. I hope this helps.
35.
July 28th, 2007 at 10:56 am e
Ron Moore: Try to break the decision down into smaller components. Often those who can’t make a decision and/or stick with one, are those who have been overwhelmed by the decision in the first place and were not able to consider all of its aspects and consequences. Try asking them for more focused decisions with a shorter time frame and work up from there
36.
July 28th, 2007 at 10:57 am e
Sheilah Etheridge: Like you, these people drive me crazy. It is one of the hardest personality defects to deal with. It comes from being insecure with their ability to make wise decisions. Some of them manage to overcome this problem.
I find that sitting them down and going over whatever it is that is causing them to be indecisive helps. Sometimes they simply aren’t sure they have the authority to make the decision, other times they are a bit gun shy and scared. If the problem is not resolved by talking to them then it is usually best to either remove them from the team or allow a bit of peer pressure from the team to correct the behavior.
37.
July 28th, 2007 at 3:08 pm e
Tarek Foda: A superior that is indecisive is a CRISIS!!!!!!!!!. That might be the end of a business if their boss doesn’t take an action about it. Do you tell, do you raise the flag; that’s an answer that will be different between each one depending on their agenda. On the interaction basis, I have been into wars with superiors that have that problem, because it delayed critical business decisions to the point it was threatening.
As for employee or a colleague, here is your chance to be the mentor and the coach, where you will be the fishing instructor; not the fisherman. let them know that it is ok to take wrong decisions, because in wrong decisions there is a great learning value.
Empowerment is a great deal here, if they only know how valuable to the team and how much their team depends on them. It is ok not to be the team leader, its even better to contribute to the team with the added value of their work and decisions.
Addressing these problems with employees and colleagues is a bit challenging, not as challenging as your superior though.
With the employees and colleagues; as long as both the problem and the cause are identified, then the solution is there. Most of the time behind an indecisive character is a lack of either empowerment or experience. Both are now easy to fix with the current management styles we are all practicing.
38.
July 28th, 2007 at 3:10 pm e
Kerry Kugelman: Defining indecisiveness can be somewhat contextual and subjective (viz., John Tummolo’s response). Is this an issue of not deciding quickly enough? Or never deciding at all? Like being “unprepared,” being indecisive should be more clearly defined.
Assuming that it’s a systemic pattern, though, I see it as a manage down, up or across situation. We can’t tell our boss that we think they are indecisive, but we can ask for our own accountability in a situation so that a decision is somehow made, and action can be taken. Maybe it’s a fear of blame, or a lack of accountability in the workplace culture, but whatever the reason, I would try to identify actionable steps to make sure that I can function, even if I cannot change the behavior of the “indecisive” individual.
39.
July 28th, 2007 at 3:11 pm e
Suzanne Cross: I find two basic drivers for indecision: Need for perfection=fear of being wrong and need to be accepted and liked = fear of rejection. For the first bucket – flood them with data and information that allows them to see the “correctness” of the choice they will make. For the second bucket – give them time, talk with them about it, get other stakeholders to agree on a position & make them feel good about the decision by making them see it will be accepted. As for not sticking to a decision, first see if they changed their minds when new information came to light. If that is true than they are probably driven by a desire to succeed and will change any thime new information arises that sets a better course. If no new information was involved, they are probably in bucket 1 or 2 and just didn’t have enough information (bucket 1) or enough alignment/support (bucket 2). People Styles at Work (also works at home) by Bolton and Bolton American Mgmt Association press http://www.amacombooks.org – quick read very enlightening and the suggestions work!
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July 28th, 2007 at 3:13 pm e
Bryan Entzminger: It seems to me that indecisions usually comes from three sources – all of which stem from a desire to do what is best and a sense of insucurity on some level.
1) Inadequate information – The person involved may feel that he or she has faulty or incomplete information or training and wants to wait until the last possible moment to decide so that the information used is the most recent and complete possible. A person in this place may feel that others are controlling or “massaging” information to control the course of downstream decisions and may lack faith with others around them.
2) Inadequate People – The person involved may not fully trust his or her abilities. Or the person may not fully trust the team to be able to implement a given course of action and may be trying to find the best “attainable” decision. Further, a person in this situation may fear that they are being manipulated into making quick decisions and may feel a need to maintain control by deferring decisions.
3) Inadequate Vision – The vision of the company/team may not have been communicated effectively or may not be clear. The person may not believe that the overall vision that is driving decisions is compelling or may even believe that the “high level” vision is wrong. A person in this position may feel like decisions on courses of action are simply an attempt by the group or by higher level leadership to “railroad” a course of action focusing on quick mid-level and low-level decisions.
So…how to deal with it. First you’ll need to decide if it’s worth it to invest your time and effort in correcting this behavior and whether you believe it is correctable. If it can’t be corrected or you’re not willing or able to exert the energy to make these changes, it might be best to look at severing the relationship.
If you’re interested in correcting or required to correct the situation, I think the first step is diagnosis – self/company diagnosis as well as diagnosing what’s going on with the individual. Does the company have a clear, well-stated vision that is driving these decisions? Is there a culture of trust? Are people allowed to make mistakes – to learn and grow?
In short, what, if any, of the blame lies with you, the team, or the company? What external (to this person) factors may be involved?
Second, is this person always indecisive? Begin evaluating the kinds of situations and decisions that seem to lead to indecisive behavior. Only big decisions? Only course of action decisions? Is it a situation where Best Practices information is unavailable or unrelated to your business situation? Are there situations where this person is actually decisive and sticks to his or her decisions? Are there other people that seem to bring out this indecisive behavior? Or who seem to be able to bring out decisive behavior?
In other words, as you begin seeing trends, what might you extrapolate the reason to be?
Finally, when you’ve been able to surmise both internal and external factors that may be contributing, begin influencing the decision-making process and the environment for decision-making within the company or team to both confirm your impressions and to allow this person to both address areas of insecurity and to succeed.
This may include a conversation with the person to address it. For example, “I’ve noticed that when … happens, you seem to respond by … which makes it hard for us to ….” At this point you can function in diagnosis, prescription, and collaboration with the person – and maybe with the rest of the team.
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July 28th, 2007 at 7:02 pm e
Marc Rapp: I suspect that indecisive behavior is more a result of the environment in which the problem is being interacted with. Meaning; interaction with a problem ( let’s use the word ‘problem’ as the catalyst for indecisiveness ) either through conceptual thought, a tactile environment or auditory experiences. Choice is a result of reflective judgment.
If this is true, then it falls back onto us as the surveyor to make the appropriate adjustments in the way the information ( problem ) is communicated and relayed to the decision maker. How well constructed is the problem? Is the problem in proper context for that individuals respective frame of reference.
Things look complex.
Things sound complex.
Things work complexly.
A: It depends on how well I know the individual. And if I’m in-fact communicating the problem idiosyncratically.
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July 28th, 2007 at 7:03 pm e
Prasanna Raghavan: In my view , i guess decision making is a resultant ability based on knowledge , experience and clarity of thought regarding possible options to handle a given situation
Moving to ur queriees ,
How do u deal with a indecisive person ?
Ans : I have encountered such situations in the past due to procrastination or sheer indecision . As mentioned earlier i feel indecision is caused majorly due to lack of knoweldge , understanding and the confidence to take a call .
Superior : Would provide gentle reminders to start and then slightly pushy reminders to move quicker and if aint working , then would try to discuss possible repercussions due to the delays .
Employee: Similar approach as stated abobe with a higher degree of push varying in intensity as per the ageing period of the decision .
Colleague : As stated in case of a Superior
When it comes to sticking with a decision , i feel that the key reason for someone to keep flipping on a decision is again the lack of understanding , clarity , insecurity due to negative results and confidence . I had this great experience with my ex boss who had decisions changing at the speed pendulum arm .. will swing on both sides in no time as per weightage of the aurgument . In couple of instances i had to re affirm his decision with him face to face and also spell it in that many words that he could re think the issue on his own and take his time all by himself . Once he confirms the decision the next there would be no scope to retract . Ideally i found that this was the only way for him to breathe free on his own and [ponder over the issue himself and arrive at a clear decision .
i guess if he happens to be handle a decision making responsbility , he might as well do so effectively and in my opinion i would have tried handling it as explained above
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July 28th, 2007 at 7:05 pm e
John Meola: Actually, my major shortcoming is indecisiveness, so I may be able to offer you an insider’s view on this. What has worked best for me is setting hard deadlines for when the decision must be made. Do not leave the person any kind of “default” choice should he/she not make the decision. Force the person to make the decision. I can tell you it will be tough on the indecisive person, but you will get your decision and the indecisive person over time will develop the ability and confidence to make decisions.
44.
July 28th, 2007 at 7:08 pm e
Lily Giambarba Casura: I guess it depends on why they’re indecisive — constitutionally or otherwise (e.g., situationally). When it comes to women, sometimes it’s because they have a desire to please, but they’re actually not so interested in doing whatever it is they say they are. Or people give a half-hearted attempt to be interested, which strikes the listener as a positive when it’s actually pretty non-committal. I found that when I wrote a book on getting over a chronic illness, only about 20% — or fewer — of the people I talked to actually WANTED to get over it, shockingly enough. Most seemed to want something else out of the mix — e.g., an attempt to validate WHY they were sick, an excuse to mask a bunch of other things like unwillingness to deal with a particular situation, etc. Odd. What you refer to in your post though about someone who gives one answer and then goes back and changes it later to me isn’t indecisive. They’re wishy-washy or don’t have enough integrity or something else, but not indecisive. Confused maybe If I look back on times I’ve been indecisive, it’s because I haven’t had enough INFORMATION (for my tastes, may be more than others need) to satisfy my ability to make a decision. I can’t come to a decision because I’m not satisfied that I know enough. But I basically never say one thing and go back on it later — that to me smacks of very little integrity, which is a core value.
45.
July 28th, 2007 at 11:33 pm e
Jay Hamilton-Roth: Is their indecision caused by a lack of information or lack of commitment? First, make sure that they have all the information they can reasonably get. Next, find out what it would take for them to choose. Lastly, ask them what would make them change their mind (and why). Finally, hold them to their promise: if they changed their mind and the information that they had didn’t change, then they are obligated to their choice.
In the case of lack of commitment (which shows up as wishy-washy attitude), find out what would make them more committed (i.e., personally invested).
In all (business) group activities, it’s a good idea to have milestones for everyone to see what’s been done, what’s left to do, and choose future plans. Make sure that the indecisive person knows that they’ll have more choices to make at these milestones, so “all” they need to do is make choices from now until then. This should make the “big” issue turn into a series of smaller ones, reducing the stress.
46.
July 28th, 2007 at 11:34 pm e
Missy White: I am going to take a different approach than the previous respondents.
Perspective #1:
First, let me clarify that I am addressing people who are slow to make a decision, and not those who switch decisions once made.
Many teams struggle to be efficient/ effective/ profitable in the LONG RUN because they settled for the quick and easy SHORT TERM answers.
Long term viability/profitability often depends on the all too rare a skill of asking better questions, and not providing snap answers.
Perspective #2
You can’t change the other person’s behaviors. All you can control is yourself. Ask yourself the following questions and see what new ideas come to mind:
- Why is lack of a swift answer problematic for you? And why is THAT problematic for you? …… And why is THAT problematic for you?…… And what about THAT is problematic for you? [Answer deliberately and honestly]
- What values do you associate with a swift answer? A slow answer?
- Thinking about the above values, what about them pleases and displeases you?
- What prevents you from having a simple face to face, heart felt and no BS conversation with this individual about your different views about speed of answer time frame?
- What about yourself do you see in this other person?
47.
July 28th, 2007 at 11:36 pm e
Jeremiah A. B. Locanas: Sometimes one simply needs to get all their ducks in line… I’m a firm believer in the theory that everything happens for a reason. Many times we do not fully understand the complexity of the webs we weave and other times we don’t have any choice but to go with the flow until enough pieces of the puzzle reveal the wizard behind the curtain… In any case, if we are lucky – sometimes all good things come to those who wait.
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July 28th, 2007 at 11:37 pm e
Gerald Lo: I try to frame the issue as best I can, to provide a reference point by which to make a decision.
Usually, the prospective benefits and disadvantages of a given choice can be identified and articulated, if not necessarily quantified.
I’ve found the issue is often not indecisiveness, it’s a reluctance to authorize a course of action. There is frequently a fear of commitment to a course.
The consequences of a delayed authorization may well be quantified. I’ve found preparing a description of the effects of delayed sanction can be helpful.
The conventional tools of project management, critical path schedules and resource plans (especially spending plans) can help identify in clear terms the effects of delayed permission to proceed.
“Once a green light is given, the end date is likely to be thus and the cost so; for such a delay, the delay to the target deadlin is this, and the additional costs imposed will be that.”
This is not to say that the objective may still be realized; buy-in is not guaranteed and management will often challenge the validity of the projection. I find this often can help, and might lend credibility in future when predictions prove accurate.
There’s an enormous body of work supporting alternatives to decision-making processes, from the Kepner-Tregoe engineering matrix to treatments of the coin toss. A few moments with a search engine can usually discover hundreds of such sites detailling options for facilitating this kind of thing.
At the end of it, all projects come to one kind of conclusion or another.
What helps me is the realization that much of my job in managing projects consists of evaluating and articulating, “What is the worst that can happen?”
Identifying the likely outcomes to the piece of the enterprise for which I am to be held responsible is well within the job description.
Failing to communicate them, the possible collateral damages, and the contingency plans attendant upon it as well as viable recovery schemes means I need to do my job better, I feel.
Sometimes the deferral of a decision or authorization may not be the worst thing that can happen, although it can be demoralizing.
I try to remember that everyone knows something I don’t, and management sometimes must make concessions based on intelligence and stimuli to which I might not be privy.
49.
July 29th, 2007 at 12:19 am e
Catherine Zhang: To better know how to handle this, we need to figure out why it happens. If it is because low self efficacy(self perceived ability to successfully perform a task), then try to encourage them and lessen their anxiety about making a wrong decision, and also express your view that any decision is better than none. Also,have a conversation with them and express your growing concern about the result of their indecisiveness. Provide them resources for decision making if you have any.
If all these methods fail, you either fire them or tolerate them–a tradeoff between how nice you want to be in their eyes and how strong you want your company be in the public.
50.
July 29th, 2007 at 8:43 am e
Lionel Spearman: Funny you should ask that – lack of a decision is also really a decision – one to let cirumstance drive ones outcome.
I afford them every change to make a decision and once hey do I hold them accountable to the outcomes regardless of how I feel with the understanding that I will be blamed because the people of whom you speak essentially do what they do so they can avoid responsibility and accountability for their actions.
51.
July 29th, 2007 at 1:19 pm e
David Marcotte: There are stages of decision making and often this person gets locked onto one of them … hard. The best you can do is to take apart the question at hand and start gaining buy-in in small steps. Incrementally building upward while reviewing and reinforcing prior small decisions. Then once you have them at the full decision, structure the full question into a framework of their prior answers.
If the negate a decision after-the-fact, then documentation from the above will help restart.
There is an assumption that this person is critical to going forward on something or another. If not, then perhaps you should cut out of the process. If they are on a team, you take them out of that role and into one of compliance … often these people are far better having someone else pull the trigger. On the team and you’re dependent on them … I would rebuild the team.
52.
July 29th, 2007 at 1:21 pm e
M. Prabhakar Rao: One such situation happened to me only a few days ago. It pertains to an address to be given by in Bangalore. At the eleventh hour it was postponed, without informing me, apparently to accommodate someone else’s schedule. I have booked the Air Tickets on no cancellation basis.
While I am utilizing these for some other purpose, the first thing that I have done is to cut them off from my list of Associates; this is to ensure no further damage can ever happen to me from these people.
As to the indecisive bosses, colleagues, etc., I always disallowed my productivity getting suffered on account of their attitude; so always confront a decision from them, failing which I take it and inform them.
53.
July 29th, 2007 at 1:22 pm e
Ray Miller: For me I try to highlight the costs of not choosing. Sometimes it increases the anxiety to the point where they tell me to make the decision. Sometimes it forces a decision. I am never too worried about making the wrong decision as long as one is made. As long as action is taken, corrections can be made to correct the course of the ship.
54.
July 29th, 2007 at 1:25 pm e
Robert Dolezal: Motivations for indecision vary, but common ones are
* Being conflicted (choosing between two negatives, two close options)
* Being in perceived personal peril (doing the right thing for the company is likely to be personally damaging)
* Avoiding agreeing with someone you dislike or who is dishonest
* Going against the group concensus
* Violating ones moral character
* Lacking of perceived key data points of information upon which to base the decision.
As you can see, these motivations have a variety of sources that result in non-action. Performing cluster analysis of the environment of the decision point will probably reveal what is tying the individual up in knots. Many times, the individual making the decision–or not–is unaware of why they are putting it off.
Likewise, clearing up the roadblocks vary by individual or group. It may be a good idea to “enable” the decision maker by disposing of their conflict by saying–if you can, and can make it stick–you won’t be held resposible if this doesn’t turn out right, I want you to do the best thing for the company.
A last resort would be to pull the responsiblity from that individual and pass it to another–but it will damage their standing.
55.
July 30th, 2007 at 7:20 pm e
John Paul Saunders: Ultimately no decision is a decision to have someone / something else make it for you. Personally and professionally I have seen this is very common practice, as people don’t want to be accountable for the outcome. The general perception is that it’s a lot easier to make a no decision as when you have someone/something make it for you, it provides a point to blame if it all goes wrong.
How to deal with this is to explain this concept and the fact the more often then not making even a wrong decision and sticking to it, can turn out to be the right decision – Helping them to recognize the accountability of a no decision generally guides people to make the call.
That said, too few people have the strength to stand up and admit that they made a wrong decision and change a decision, based on the new information presented.
So which is worse?
56.
July 30th, 2007 at 7:23 pm e
Andy Upchurch: I think the majority of people faced with making a key decision, whether in life or business, is fundamentally the same – it involves some level of risk. People who are unable or unwilling to make or stake a decision have yet to evaluate and appreciate the risk involved in the decision. Usually I will present a person with a couple of choices that are “safe” either way and allow them to succeed. This bolsters their confidence and allows them to test new waters. People who are unwilling to make decisions shouldn’t be put in a position where the risk is too great. The same with those who flounder in their decisions – second guessing – is a real problem. These types of people have a direct result in the one of the foundations in relationships – trust. If I can’t trust a coworker or employer I can’t work for them. If a decision is made and a plan is underway and that plan changes due to indecisiveness, trust is compromised. And yes, it is VERY challenging. Great question.
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July 30th, 2007 at 7:26 pm e
David P. Schofield: When a person is indecisive, I find that in many instances they don’t believe their own first response. I normally take their first response and see it if works, ignoring for the most part all the counter points they present afterwards.
58.
July 30th, 2007 at 7:27 pm e
Jeff Donovan: As you mention in your question, how you handle this is probably going to depend on the context; social of business.
If it’s business and you are dealing with a subordinate, it’s relatively easy. Give them a deadline, coach them as much as possible as to what the expected result is (report, program, whatever) and act accordingly?
I also think it’s important to let people know that they cannot wait for “all the info” before making a decision. You almost never get that luxury in the business world.
If that person is leading a team for me, they probably will not be for very long.
I’ve never had to deal with a superior who had this issue. I would think that in almost all cases such a flaw in their management style would have limited their ability to be promoted.
In a personal context it’s very different. I had a past girlfriend who was very indecisive. I was usually the one who made plans as to what we do when we were together. One Friday night I decided that we were going to do whatever she decided, that I was not going to OK it or in any other way re-affirm her decision.
We never left my apartment. And she wasn’t around for much longer
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July 30th, 2007 at 8:18 pm e
Brenda Knight: This can be very challenging. It is a difference in communication styles – formal versus informal. I have also found that in this day and age wherein email is such a vital form of business communication. that seeminly indecisive people will not answer email. but I think a nonanswer is really a “no” and they are too passive to be direct about it. It can be passive agressive behavior, as well.
Have you tried asking them out for coffee to discuss? Perhaps they are unaware that their communication style is coming across in this way.
I agree wholeheartedly that this can be really detrimental to a team so I say, bring it up for the sake of the team.
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July 31st, 2007 at 8:47 am e
James Parsons: Hey Earl, as with the last question you posted that I responded to – I may go against the wave here and defend some forms of “indecision.” I think the point of view that some are perfectionistic can be very true, and the ones that NEVER made a decision – that often maybe a root cause. However, I also think the Myers-Briggs issues that were noted in your prior question can come to play in this one.
Many of those that responded to you, if I had to take a stab in the dark, are “J” personalities. Many may also be ISTJ’s or INTJ’s who often are VERY quick to make the decision and move on. That, after all, is the benefit of being a judger in its parlance. However, as an ENFP, I often find such individuals may TOO quickly make up their mind on less than sufficient evidence, and little (even clear evidence to the contrary) may shake them from their views. Deciding too quickly can be as damaging to an organization as deciding too slowly. The Bear philosophy is probably appropriate – not to soft or too hard, but just right.
Problem with that answer is that it is highly dependent upon the facts, which may be evolving. Do I need to bring up the Iraq War and the WMD debate? That was clearly a rush to judgment on faulty intel. I am sure we call can think of someone who was so certain they were right – and won’t change course even when the evidence seems to strongly suggest they were wrong.
I think without knowing the circumstances in play it is hard to know if the decision making process in the abstract is “just right.” As a staff attorney, I do know that often you hear one side and it seems ‘well that is probably the answer,’ only to then hear the other side and think ‘oh, maybe there is a fair dispute,’ and then it takes looking up the law, the facts, and trying to sort out often gray areas.
As with the prior discussion that impacted Myers-Briggs, this might be another area where it could be useful to place people in decision-making circumstances that will be affected by their personality. Important decisions probably are best made, everything else being equal, by people who are not strongly “J” or “P” in Myers-Briggs, but are balanced. Situations that require quick reactions, when time does not allow much deliberation, might favor “J” personalities, but with “P” personalities providing insight.
Not a very decisive answer, I guess, but again, I am an ENFP!
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July 31st, 2007 at 8:48 am e
Jennifer Davis: I suppose it is good to know why they are not making a decision or waffling about one they already made. Is it insecurity? A lack of empowerment? A lack of capability to make certain types of decisions? Not all folks are cut out to make decisions of some types, which is why not everyone who is a capable manager or leader makes a great CEO. If the individual themselves doesn’t see the results of their indecision and do some soul-searching as to why they delay, then they probably will not change…no matter how many people offer them counsel
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July 31st, 2007 at 8:50 am e
Jess Villegas:
1. Evaluate the environment in which the individual operates – Does it support individuals and their decisions, or it it one where decisions are always subject to 2nd guessing. Right or wrong an individual must feel that, on the assumption that the proper effort and competency are invested, their decisions will be respected.
2. Continually make the Objective, whatever it is, the focal point of every discussion so that accountability is clearly defined.
3. Coach the individual through their priorities so that they can internalize the process for aligning decisions with objectives.
63.
July 31st, 2007 at 8:51 am e
Matt Gibbons: Dealing with employees and colleagues is challenge. From my own humble point of view, I just try to be a mirror for the decision. I let the person sound off about the decision, the possible outcomes and the risks. Sometimes people just need the situation crystalisd for them, and it helps them decide on which way to go.
Sometimes with employees, I have made it clear that I can make the decision for them if they want. But I also make it clear to them that I will be doing their job for them…
How you deal with superiors is that same challenge, but multiply it by ten. The only thing I have found that works sometimes is to build decision matrices and outline benefit and risk. But going to a superior directly and saying “Hey, time is up! We´ve got to geting going!” is no easy thing to do. You can only do this by managing to bring pressure from their peers.
But I have to admit that I have to be careful. I can make decisions very, very quickly – lots of others need to be more analytical. You need to be aware that decision making styles vary from person to person.
There is a tool out there called “Decision X”, which I have used before. We used it in our team and discovered that people have different ways of coming to decisions. Used within a team, it can be very powerful. For example, on bigger, more complex decisions, I now try to find a more analytical person to help slow me down a little bit. I recommend it.
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July 31st, 2007 at 10:42 am e
Raghuraman Anantharamakrishnan: The answer lies in building capability!! Building capability is always a challenge. But this is the answer to most complex problems such as this. First, develop an SLA culture – performance should be clearly defined and metrics to accomplish highlighted. Once this is done, question performance based on targets met or achieved and not on decisions taken to accomplish tasks. When you question decisions, you are not giving a free-hand to your sub-ordinate (or superior). If it’s necessary, evaluate performance on a daily-basis, week-on-week basis or whatever time frequency you may choose.
Questioning performance is the best way to build capability. There may be several other ways to build capability – e.g.: build simulated environments where the sub-ordinate may try his thoughts/solutions, conduct training sessions in specific areas of focus and so on.
Secondly, as a golden rule, don’t criticize your sub-ordinate or superior openly (though you may want to be as frank as possible!!). Highlight the pros first and then follow up with the cons in a way which will propel the sub-ordinate/supervisor to think and work in the right direction. For instance, say – “I really liked the way you penned the presentation. However, I thought it could be better if you had